Do you care too much? Is it taking away some happiness? Read on to discover 5 Ways to Care Less and Be Happy.
Do you find yourself stewing about things?
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If that one person starts acting differently, you immediately think the worst.
Someone treats you unfairly and you take it personally.
Someone insults you and you actually start to believe it.
Someone disappoints you and you automatically think it was on purpose, only to hurt you.
What about that co-worker who did that thing that left you pissed way beyond dinner time?
We’ve all been there.
The art of caring too much.
It’s a form of anxiety that is hard to deal with and it can take up a lot of our precious time.
My husband has mastered the art of simply not caring.
He lets things roll off his back and is on his merry way.
I would love to master the art of simply not giving a shit.
I’ve seen people irritate him or have witnessed people try and bother him.
It doesn’t bother him for long.
Me, on the other hand, I’m still thinking about things that have happened months or maybe even years ago.
Life is stressful enough. Then to add to it, a person opens their mouth and says something insensitive or hurts you in some way and boom. Stress level is even higher.
This type of stress is not good for our health.
I know I’m not the only one that lives like this.
I have an old friend that was very sensitive.
If I had a bad day and simply wanted to be alone, she immediately thought I was upset with her.
Really, that wasn’t the reality.
I simply needed to decompress.
Because I wasn’t acting like my normal self, she thought she had done something to irritate me.
Then she would sit and stew about it all night.
It would eat away at her until she heard the words come out of my mouth telling her that I wasn’t upset with her, that I just had a bad day and needed to relax.
I’ve been that person, but my friend had it really bad.
As a friend, I’m just going to say it, it was annoying.
Even though I’ve never had it as bad as her, the level that it affects me isn’t fun to live with.
I met up with her recently and spent some time with her.
One thing I noticed was that she seemed a lot less worried, anxious and stressed.
She looks great, has a great attitude and emanates happiness.
I had to ask her.
I had to know what she had done to change from her old anxious, caring-too-much self to this new woman.
She knew she was previously over the top, so when I mentioned how different she seemed, she wasn’t surprised.
Now, before I get any further, I want to say that having some level of caring and some level of anxiety is healthy.
Anxiety is a natural feeling we get when something is wrong and it’s really meant as a protective measure to tell us when danger is close.
Of course it’s normal to be hurt and care when someone insults you or disappoints you, but it’s the context that is important.
By no means am I saying I want to have no feelings, but I want to be stronger when it comes to situations that I should handle better.
Anyway, back to my friend.
I’m going to summarize the main 5 points she shared with me that helped her calm down, and I mean calm down a lot.
5 Ways to Care Less and Be Happy
Count your blessings.
She said that by being conscious of how very much she is blessed she is able to more easily let go of the petty things.
I couldn’t agree with her more.
One thing I always try to do is realize that things could be so much worse.
That really helps me put things in perspective.
Realizing that I’m healthy, my beautiful family is healthy and that I’ve got so many people that love me usually instantly calms me down. This is a good book to get your started.
Realize now that not everyone will like you.
There are a billion million people in the world, and you’re bound to get a few that don’t like you for whatever reason.
Just as you most likely don’t like everyone you come in contact with.
Realize that you cannot control what people feel and how they specifically feel about you.
The sooner you can come to peace with this, the sooner you will feel better.
This book has a rough title, but what’s inside is very true.
Talk to someone.
I’m not just saying this because I’m a therapist.
I’m saying this because it works!
Although my friend was in therapy, she told me that by talking to her husband or friend when something was bothering her, the quicker she felt it lift away.
I’m a big believer in this.
It’s almost as if we don’t get it out by either talking or writing it down (journals are amazing too!) it will fester in our brain and can really ruin our day, or week.
If you can’t see a therapist, then make a coffee date with a good friend, go visit your parents or grandparents, and just chat.
Chances are they have something they want to chat about too!
Practice self care and learn to love yourself.
When we talk about self care, we often think about meditation or doing something as simple as gardening to get our mind off of the stress in our lives and to focus on something we enjoy doing.
It’s important to work on your self worth and self esteem all the time as well.
Often times things fester because we start to believe it.
If someone insults you, chances are it’s not true.
Spend time writing down the things you love about yourself and things you know to be true.
I have a good friend who struggles with questioning her parenting.
While I know she’s a wonderful mother (one of the best and strongest I know) she, herself, doesn’t truly know that.
When I challenge her on it, she really never has a response to back up her thoughts, which is a huge red flag that it’s simply not true.
I urge you to challenge yourself if you’re feeling some type of way.
Ask yourself why you believe it. Chances are you really don’t.
If you come across something you honestly do believe is true, there is never a better time to start making changes than right now.
Implement small changes and praise yourself for following through.
Soon enough, your outlook will change.
This book is very helpful in getting out of your own way.
While it’s true that exercise is great for our physical health, it’s also great for our mental health.
Exercise helps to elevate the good mood hormones and it definitely will help to clear your mind.
My friend started implementing a daily exercise routine, and she said it’s one of the things she attributes the most to her change.
For her, it calms her down and the wait loss as a result has helped her self esteem.
You don’t have to be a star athlete, you just have to get moving.
Take a walk.
Mow the lawn.
Clean out the basement.
Mop your floors.
Go for a run if you’d like.
You won’t regret it.
So there are the five things that really helped my friend lower her level of giving a shit and help her live a happier life.
She said it took a bit of work at first, but it just becomes second nature after a while.
There will be things in life that disappoint, irritate, anger and annoy all of us.
Some people get through it more easily than others.
I’m going to implement these five tips and see if they help me care less so I can spend my time focusing on things that matter in life.
I hope you can too!
I hope you’ve enjoyed the 5 Ways to Care Less and Be Happy!
If you have any tips to share, please comment below or send me a message through the contact link here.
I wish you happy thoughts and calm days!